She held his left hand while his right hand took chips from the bowl and he put them in her mouth carefully so they wouldn't fall on her lap. He took a napkin and wiped her mouth as she chewed on the chips. She gazed into his eyes as he squeezed her hand asking her if she wanted to get some rest. She didn't say a word, but he knew she wanted to sit down and watch while the strangers talked and laughed with just the look of her eyes. He would laugh with them too and he would tell them stories about where they were and how life had been. She could only gaze at the strangers' faces. She could only listen to them. She wanted to say so much, but did not know how. She simply reached out with her other hand the hand of the other person sitting next to her without really letting go of his hand on the other. She stood up and pulled him with her. She walked towards the kitchen while he followed her there, still hands locked. He led her back to the comfortable sofa where the visitors were and as one of them reached out her hand to her, she held on tightly. He smiled at her, she looked at him. He smiles, pushes back her hair and tells her everything is okay.
For four years, this had been their life. She had never really said anything, except on some instances where she would suddenly blurt out a word or two and then nothing again. Sometimes she would laugh. Sometimes she would smile. Her beautiful face has not aged one bit, but in her mind probably are so many images and thoughts swirling about, so many things to say, she just probably didn't know how to.
That was my experience today. I saw unconditional love. I felt unconditional love.
On our way home, I could not help but say a prayer of gratitude for the things that I have--the ability to speak my mind, the capacity to write about what I feel. I felt the urgency to say "I love you" to my kids and my husband. I said a prayer in my head for the safety and health of my loved ones, my parents and my siblings. I whispered to God, "Lord, please keep me strong and healthy. I know you have plans for me. I know now why you continue to make me feel these feelings, why you lead me to people and why you give me these experiences. Thank you."
I am grateful for what I have and I was inspired to continue on to my dream of inspiring others and remind them that they are excellent and beautiful creations of God, to not waste every bit of skill and talent that was innately given to them to change their lives for the better. Today has inspired me to continue on telling others that we all live for a purpose and reason. Today reminded me that no challenge is given if He knew we could not bear it. Today, I felt how blessed I am to have what I have, to be alive and to be who I am.
Why did such a simple experience compel me to write about it? Simply because, I have always searched for some meaning in what I do today. Why do I keep hoping the world is going to change? Why do I keep believing that love still existed? Simply because I know there is still hope. We can still change. Today was an example of unconditional love.
There is a song that is playing in my head right now, "What the world needs now is love, sweet love..." and yes, all the world needs is more love and less hate. If we could just stopped talking for one bit and listened more, held each other's hand and be contented and grateful with what we already have, then life would be so much simpler and less stressful. We go about asking for things we want to have, we complain so much, we expect others to treat us better. Have we ever stopped and checked ourselves if we really deserve these things we want? Did we really do our our part to make things work? Did we respect others? I borrow a line now from her, these are indeed "Monsters in our Head."
I do know that many of us are still of sane mind and with the rationality and logic, we can ward of these monsters and choose to be better. We can all hope to be better. We can do something about our lives so we can find a solution to all of our problems, to satiate our insatiable hunger for knowledge and to quench our thirst for unconditional love if we knew where to look, if we knew what was important in our lives, if we wanted these things for the perfectly right reasons.
I believe she fights off the monsters in her head with a simple squeeze of his hand, with an assuring look that he will be there for her for as long as he can, to love her unconditionally until they grow old or until she relearns to talk again and function independently. I feel that to finally learn what true love really is, we have just got to look in the right places, be sensitive about what others feel and fight off all the monsters in our head.
