Be...

There is a verse in the Bible that I have learned to tell myself when I find myself in the middle of so much chaos, too much noise, too much uncertainty and doubt. When I first heard it from a friend, I thought, I'm going to try it soon. Soon indeed happened today.

Psalm 46:10 says, "Be still and know that I am God." At first read, I thought it was just a sentence that exalts God and recognizing Him as my Higher Power. I realized that there was more to it than that.

Counting from one to ten when I got so irritated today, I started thinking about it and started saying it over and over and then from the end, I started taking one word out from the sentence, at a time. As if in a trance, I found myself more relaxed, more at ease and less stressed.

Be still and know that I am God...

Be still and know that I am...

Be still and know that I...

Be still and know that...

Be still and know...

Be still and...

Be still...

Be...

I realized after that that there was so much that had accomplished saying this to myself until I was calm and ready to face another set of challenge that will come my way. I was able to exalt my God, my Lord, my Father. I put myself in a very quiet place and saw the things that can change my disposition from frustrated to hopeful, from sad to happy, from wanting to contented. I felt that I could accomplish things. I felt the peace of mind I so deign in a noisy world such as ours and then finally, I saw and I felt that I can do things for as long as I put my heart and my soul into it.

Some days, I know I will still get angry and frustrated, but at least now, I know how to shoo away anger and start being hopeful again... at least just so I can get moving again. There are other ways of moving out from a space of stress and intense emotions and this is just one of them. A prayer, words that soothe and calm you down, a reminder to one's self of his or her worth, and telling yourself you can do it whatever it is that you put your mind into -- what else can go wrong?

practicing forgiveness...

Every day, I go through situations that test my patience. I meet people who raise their eyebrows when they listen to my ideals and my principles. I experience people who insist on what they want without compromise and who believe that they are always better than me. I have, however, learned that we were all made different and as such, I cannot insist on what I want as well. I can only express how I feel and how I want things done, but at the end of each day, it's all about listening what can work better and what will work best.

At each time, I remember what I have heard so many times from people, who just like me, want to make life work 100% and that is to negotiate, to shift and to have no judgments, opinions and expectations of others; that there are things that happen that I have no control of and that I can only control what I feel and how I may react. It may sound like I am a martyr, but it is in choosing to control my own emotions and feelings that I am able to reach out and communicate when I need to negotiate with people who may be hard and difficult, closed-minded and angry with pride.

I practice the art of forgiveness in whatever way I can. I believe that all of us were created to be great, to be excellent and that we all have purpose. Every single person that we meet, though they may test our patience, our understanding and our capacity to forgive, we come across each of these so that we may learn what living is all about. We go through hurdles everyday, but it is up to us to choose to see what is beautiful and what is wonderful. To see behind the dark clouds of despair, frustration and doubt is a feat, but it can be done, to me, to go through life, it must be done.

Practicing forgiveness is not just about our relationship with other people. More importantly, it is forgiving ourselves for choices that we make at the end of every day. For whatever we think, say and do, we are responsible for these that we create. Practicing forgiveness is about doing everything humanly possible so that we can accept ourselves and in this acceptance of who we are, we learn to accept others for what they are and what they believe in.

We get hurt, we cry in pain, we writhe in frustration and desperation, but yet, when all tears have been shed, our lives must go on. We must move forward with dignity, integrity and commitment to what matters and what is important.

To practice forgiveness, we must begin with ourselves, only then can we move forward.