Friday, June 10, 2011

You never really know what you've got until you lose it.

She chooses to remain firm on her decision to cut off all communication with the people she used to call family and friends. She insists on saying that she does not owe anyone for the success she has in life, for the wealth that she possesses and for the social class of society she belongs to today. She has chosen to turn her back on her past believing that her past did not contribute to who she is today. She lives on her own rules, her principles and her truths. She is who she is because of what she has done for herself. It was her choice, it was always her choice.

She is powerful. She is intelligent. She has everything material. She has everything she could possibly want -- all the glitter, all the gold... everything. She said to herself, "These are mine because I chose to live according to my terms. These are mine and no one can ever take them away from me. I am happy. I am complete."

Now, as she takes a leisurely walk in the park, she is awed by the beautiful sunset. Everything around her seems so perfect. The flowers were now in full bloom. Spring was here. Children were running around and laughing, couples on picnic tables were chatting, while many just like her were happy idly sitting down on park benches seemingly to just pass the time until it was time to go home.

She sat down on one of the empty benches. She looked at her watch and realized it was almost time to go. She took another deep breath and decided, another ten minutes. But she grew impatient, and just as soon as she saw a couple of people started packing their things. She stood up and headed towards the busy street.

Walking home, she realized she needed a few things from the convenience store. Milk for tomorrow, coffee, some muffins for breakfast, soap and detergent. She needed to do some washing in the morning to prepare for Monday's work. She could not help but overhear a young family behind her in the counter as she paid her bill. The dad was talking to the mom about the baby's needs. The cute little baby was happily playing with a tissue roll in the cart that contained a few items, some cereal and some fruit. The eldest's son school fees was due in the next two weeks. a daughter was still in the hospital, late diagnosis of leukemia. She did not have much time. On hearing this, she frowned. Poor family, she thought. Some people just can't have it all. She smiled to herself. "I'm glad I'm not in their shoes," she muttered to herself. She snapped at the cashier for taking so much time in checking out her credit card. The poor girl, frightened, hands shaking handed her the card and told her it was okay. She flashed dagger looks and stormed off. How incompetent, she thought.

As she opened the door to her posh apartment. She started calling out names. First her husband's name, then her son's name and finally, her daughter's name. There was silence. She called out again. Still, there was no answer. And in that moment, it hit her. As she rushed into their bedroom, she saw the closet doors wide open, no more contents. Everything was gone. She ran to her children's bedroom and everything was gone, even the toys she had given them for Christmas.

And then she remembered...

That morning, her husband and her were arguing about bank accounts being closed out without her knowledge. And then the litany of what she had done for them, for everything that she had provided for them. She started throwing things at him. She hit her with a coffee mug. He was bleeding and then he said it, "I am going to leave you. I am taking the kids with me. You never have time for us anymore." The children looked at her and with tears in their eyes, frightened from what they had seen and heard, ran to their father and both of them held on to him so tight. And then, in anger, she cried out, "Then leave. You will never get anything from me. Everything is mine. You can take the children. I do not care. You walk out that door, don't you ever come back." And then, she stormed off the apartment and decided to take a walk.

She had everything, but now, she has nothing.

No comments: